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Awkward Silence…Broken or Perpetuated?

September 2, 2010 by Dave McCoy

As the summer season prepares to bid us adieu and in our case it seems quite hastily, I reflect upon all the memorable days on the water, good and bad. Thankfully there are rarely bad ones and even the few of those are really only bad in my mind, clients were very happy even when the fish didn’t get the email/fax/me screaming at them.

On some of those days, and for you other guides (especially winter steelhead guides) or even anglers who have promised the world to someone, or expected it and it just never materialized, there is always a point in the day where instruction gets old, the 6 pack of Guiness/PBR/Olympia/Fat Tire is gone, all safe conversational topics have been covered

Fish are rising but person can’t set the hook or get a fly to them or fish have vacated the river, one of the two anyway and the silence could easily be break your hand if you punched it, yeah, that thick and the “Why do fish jump?” quip was pulled from the bag long ago. No need to remind them, again!

Well good news, this situation should be forever wiped clean of our industry and potentially others as well. Awkward silence no more! Allow me to introduce the following:

10 years ago or more, myself and another shop employee were working at the Telluride Angler during off season, a deathly position there, that time of year as water is in perfect shape and all tourists are gone. So not only do you not get to talk about fishing with anyone, you don’t get to fish either. Thumbing through a catalog, Dan found these and we ordered one or two for the shop as jokes. It was AWESOME! At first we stuck it on the manequin out front of the shop on main street and since it has a remote control, we could let it go from clear inside the shop and watch everyone’s reactions. We sold over 700 of those in just under 2 months!!

I kept one with me on the Gunnison for awhile for just those moments, you know, these guys had booked the Salmonfly Hatch a year in advance are currently in the process of missing it by 3 days. Pissed they are but tension was well relieved when I started complaining that I didn’t feel well…and had to let it all go.

Here is the greatest thing about this…wait, there is way more than just one great thing, according to the packaging there are now 15 different emanations documented here. So the 16th best thing to keep it real is just turn it on around people with cell phones because they randomly set it off without warning!

My daughter LOVES it, wanted to take it to school for show and tell. I was about half way to school with her when mom threatened a number of things, we were both disappointed!

Take this for what it is, potty humor, if you really dig it though, there is a great book my daughter found, she is almost 5 by the way, here are the links to both:

The Fart Machine

Farts: A Spotters Guide

I understand this isn’t for everyone, good guides will know who they can use it on and who they can’t. For those who know me, this post will come as no surprise and for those who don’t, I would be able to tell if it wasn’t appropriate, doesn’t mean I wouldn’t still do it just once though!!

Happy fall fishing everyone.

Filed Under: Emerald Water Anglers Tagged With: Emerald Water Anglers, fart machine, guiding, Seattle, Telluride Angler

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